May 26, 2006
(by chumeister)
"I think it is a pretty widely accepted fact as to what one of the best parts of any relationship is: the honeymoon. And no, I'm not talking about the week you spend in the Bahamas after everyone has held their peace and the bride is kissed. I'm
talking about that initial phase in a relationship, when rationality is
thrown out the window, and all that matters is the person you're with. Those
first few weeks or months (or for the truly lucky ones, years) where
nothing can affect the halo of "newness" surrounding your relationship. Where
your infatuation is still so strong that your thoughts inevitably
wander towards your significant other, no matter what you might
actually be doing at the time ("Honey, I was at the waste processing plant today, and I thought of you.").
Ah, the honeymoon. It's a good time. But
just like the actual sandy beaches and umbrella drinks honeymoon that
follows the wedding, the new relationship honeymoon will have to come
to an end. It's inevitable. It's unavoidable. It's chemical. Eventually,
the chemicals that allowed you to ignore all the little imperfections
and idiosyncrasies of your new mate will begin to wear off. Until one day, when you're asking yourself, How come I never noticed that he doesn't take his shoes off when he comes into my room? or Why didn't I realize that she was a Communist sympathizer? And just like that, the honeymoon is over.
I think, like most people, I dread the end of this honeymoon period. After all, who doesn't want to constantly feel the exhilaration that accompanies a new relationship? The excitement of the discovery process. And the inevitable discovery of the traits that make your significant other just a few rungs short of perfection in your eyes. Because when you're in your honeymoon phase, those imperfections don't matter. You ignore them because they are so insignificant relative to the happiness that you feel just being with that person. If ever there was a time to find out your companion's hidden flaws, it's during the honeymoon.
Yet much as I like the honeymoon period, what comes after it can be just as fun. In some ways, it's even better. Because when you're in the honeymoon, you never get to experience the highs and the lows. It's just high, high, high, all off the time. And that can get well, boring. It's the arguments, the frustrations, and the battles of wills that make a relationship real. Those are the things that help to shape a relationship. Everyone has a honeymoon period. And most honeymoons are fairly similar to what I described. But relationships are always different. Relationships let you truly see whether you can be with someone. Of course, honeymoon periods that seem perfect can sometimes devolve into relationships full of bickering and bitterness. But sometimes, relationships can evolve into something even better than the honeymoon period. They can turn into something real. Something that requires actual discussion and compromise to grow. Something with a limitless future, rather than an inevitable conclusion.
So yes, I'll
be sad when the honeymoon ends. But I'll also be excited for what
happens next. And yes, I'm sure the "relationship" phase will have
its share of arguments and tears. But that's okay with me. After all,
you can't...make-up...unless you fight a little bit first."
Monday, August 20, 2012
August 6, 2004
LASIK Procedure: $3000
Being able to see without contacts/glasses: PRICELESS
Getting LASIK done is seriously one of the best things I could've done for myself, as well as being a most worthwhile investment. Just being able to get up in the morning and see without putting on glasses first is to me, a gift, heck - even a miracle. Before my surgery, when my alarm rang to wake me up every day, I would have to stick my face right in front of the clock and squint to see the time. (Did you know that a prescription of -3 to -4 is considered legally blind? If that's the case, I was way beyond legally blind!) Yesterday morning after my surgery, when I heard the radio blast, all I had to do was turn my head and voila! the red numbers displaying 6:30 were crisp and clear.
On Wednesday, I was so ready to have LASIK done and over with. My time at work flew and before I knew it, I was at the doctor's office, signing the consent forms with my mom as my witness. They could tell I was pretty "energetic," so they ended up giving me 3 valium. I had asked previously how I would know it was working, and after just two, I knew. My limbs felt really heavy and my mom had to hold my arm because I could barely walk straight. Mentally I was still alert though. They took me into the room and I laid down, while the music from the cd I brought in filled the air. The doctor came in, got me prepped while explaining again what would be happening. He went through everything step by step and told me how the procedure was going along the way. It was pretty much painless; I only felt a split second of pressure when he put the clamp on to keep each eye open. (I had no trouble not blinking either!) I hadn't watched a surgery beforehand, so I assumed that the red blinking light I'd be fixating on would be just that, but to me it looked more like a ball of fire, which kept me fascinated and unblinking. Each eye only took 60 seconds to laser, so the procedure was done in like 5 minutes. (And it was 60 seconds for my eyes because of my high prescription; if you have a lesser number, it'll be like 20 seconds!) When the doctor moved the machinery away from me, he asked me to read the clock on the wall. I told him "Quarter to six" and everyone clapped and congratulated me. I walked out, rested for a while on a lounge chair, then was able to go home. I kept my eyes closed for as much as possible and went to bed early.
The next morning was a whole new me. I went to work to usual and everything. I even drove last night for a celebratory Jamba Juice with some friends. (No problem with the night vision.) I had my post-op checkup yesterday in the afternoon, and the doctor said that my vision is doing great for less than a day after and that I can expect my vision to get even better! After dinner last night, I watched the video of my surgery that the doctor sent home with me. I couldn't believe I was watching my own eyes being done. I admit it was pretty gross, but I was laughing because I was in such disbelief. This science and technology stuff is truly amazing.
As for my doctor, I highly recommend him. His name is Dr. Emil Chynn and you can find out more about his practice at his site, www.iwant2020.com . I totally trusted him and wasn't worried about the possibility of going blind or having some sort of complication. He answered all my questions, as well as his staff, who all had LASIK done by him as well. Dr. Chynn even had LASIK done on himself and now he's 20/20. His office manager who had it done a few months ago, is 20/13, which is even better than 20/20! I was just so excited to see the end result. I knew that when it came to my eyes, I had to go to the best doctor I could find, and he is it. He even called me at home that night to give me his cell phone number in case I had any discomfort I was worried about. I didn't at all! I had a great night of sleep and even woke up earlier than usual because I thought I had been sleeping for too long. If you're considering LASIK or LASEK, go for it with Dr. Chynn. You won't be disappointed.
What's funny about this whole thing is that I swore that before my surgery I had put my glasses in its case, in my bag. But when I got home and dumped everything out, they were gone! I looked for them everywhere, even asked the staff when I went back yesterday, but they're nowhere to be found. Not that I'll ever need them again, but I wanted them for sentimental value. Oh well, I guess this is a sign!
If you want to know more about LASIK from me, just ask! I'm a walking testimonial and success story. I couldn't be more thrilled with how it all turned out.
Being able to see without contacts/glasses: PRICELESS
Getting LASIK done is seriously one of the best things I could've done for myself, as well as being a most worthwhile investment. Just being able to get up in the morning and see without putting on glasses first is to me, a gift, heck - even a miracle. Before my surgery, when my alarm rang to wake me up every day, I would have to stick my face right in front of the clock and squint to see the time. (Did you know that a prescription of -3 to -4 is considered legally blind? If that's the case, I was way beyond legally blind!) Yesterday morning after my surgery, when I heard the radio blast, all I had to do was turn my head and voila! the red numbers displaying 6:30 were crisp and clear.
On Wednesday, I was so ready to have LASIK done and over with. My time at work flew and before I knew it, I was at the doctor's office, signing the consent forms with my mom as my witness. They could tell I was pretty "energetic," so they ended up giving me 3 valium. I had asked previously how I would know it was working, and after just two, I knew. My limbs felt really heavy and my mom had to hold my arm because I could barely walk straight. Mentally I was still alert though. They took me into the room and I laid down, while the music from the cd I brought in filled the air. The doctor came in, got me prepped while explaining again what would be happening. He went through everything step by step and told me how the procedure was going along the way. It was pretty much painless; I only felt a split second of pressure when he put the clamp on to keep each eye open. (I had no trouble not blinking either!) I hadn't watched a surgery beforehand, so I assumed that the red blinking light I'd be fixating on would be just that, but to me it looked more like a ball of fire, which kept me fascinated and unblinking. Each eye only took 60 seconds to laser, so the procedure was done in like 5 minutes. (And it was 60 seconds for my eyes because of my high prescription; if you have a lesser number, it'll be like 20 seconds!) When the doctor moved the machinery away from me, he asked me to read the clock on the wall. I told him "Quarter to six" and everyone clapped and congratulated me. I walked out, rested for a while on a lounge chair, then was able to go home. I kept my eyes closed for as much as possible and went to bed early.
The next morning was a whole new me. I went to work to usual and everything. I even drove last night for a celebratory Jamba Juice with some friends. (No problem with the night vision.) I had my post-op checkup yesterday in the afternoon, and the doctor said that my vision is doing great for less than a day after and that I can expect my vision to get even better! After dinner last night, I watched the video of my surgery that the doctor sent home with me. I couldn't believe I was watching my own eyes being done. I admit it was pretty gross, but I was laughing because I was in such disbelief. This science and technology stuff is truly amazing.
As for my doctor, I highly recommend him. His name is Dr. Emil Chynn and you can find out more about his practice at his site, www.iwant2020.com . I totally trusted him and wasn't worried about the possibility of going blind or having some sort of complication. He answered all my questions, as well as his staff, who all had LASIK done by him as well. Dr. Chynn even had LASIK done on himself and now he's 20/20. His office manager who had it done a few months ago, is 20/13, which is even better than 20/20! I was just so excited to see the end result. I knew that when it came to my eyes, I had to go to the best doctor I could find, and he is it. He even called me at home that night to give me his cell phone number in case I had any discomfort I was worried about. I didn't at all! I had a great night of sleep and even woke up earlier than usual because I thought I had been sleeping for too long. If you're considering LASIK or LASEK, go for it with Dr. Chynn. You won't be disappointed.
What's funny about this whole thing is that I swore that before my surgery I had put my glasses in its case, in my bag. But when I got home and dumped everything out, they were gone! I looked for them everywhere, even asked the staff when I went back yesterday, but they're nowhere to be found. Not that I'll ever need them again, but I wanted them for sentimental value. Oh well, I guess this is a sign!
If you want to know more about LASIK from me, just ask! I'm a walking testimonial and success story. I couldn't be more thrilled with how it all turned out.
What he doesn't know will drive you nuts
Wednesday, November 16, 2005
You met him a while ago, and somehow he managed to get stuck in your head like that lyric "Shake it like a Polaroid picture." Just like you know, (after being an owner of a Polaroid camera for 10 years), that you're not supposed to shake the picture because it actually messes up the developing, you don't know why he's there. But he is, whether you like it or not. You know his cell phone number, his home phone number; even where he likes to buy groceries. But he doesn't know.
His screen name is one that cleverly incorporates part of his name, a nickname, or something that he loves to do. He adds one or two numbers at the end for his birthday, or simply because it's his lucky number. With the help of Dead Aim, you know exactly when he's no longer away because you see that little blue box shoot up from the corner of your computer screen with "_______" has just signed on. That's when you have a decision to make. To IM or not to IM? You wait a little at first, so it doesn't seem like you've been waiting for him to come back online. Then you decide not to IM him, hoping that he'll double-click your screen name first. You only seem to act this silly when it comes to the guy you like. But he doesn't know.
He's the one. All right, so maybe not the "one." Not absolutely, positively the one you're going to marry or something, but closer to Mr. Right-up-there-with-Brad-Pitt-in-Mr.-and Mrs.-Smith-or-Keanu-Reeves-in-Speed-on-your-list-of-people-you'd-give-anything-to-be-stranded-with-on-a-broken-down-elevator. (Like I was yesterday after the fire drill.) But it's about more than that. When is it ever about more than that? Never. Not like penguin suits, a 10-tier cake, embarrassing relatives who talk really loud more, but closer to a comfy blanket, two cafe mochas from Starbucks to stay awake because you two are always burning the midnight oil and need caffeine, one of those wedge-shaped pillows and a movie you have no interest in seeing more. But he doesn't know.
He's cute; a one-of-a-kind-cute that maybe only a few girls can see, but that's the best kind of cute to be. More like you're startled every time you see him, especially when you aren't expecting it and you can't help but think, Oh my gosh, do I look okay? Because he looks soo good. But then you can't help but notice that he didn't spike up his hair like he usually does, and so it has that soft, fluffy look about it. More like you can't stop writing these sentences that run on and on and make no sense at all, because it seems almost impossible to describe something ... someone ... as wonderful as he is. But you're a writer, at least on your spare time. You can describe anything if you put your mind to it. That's what you do: even though your major was accounting/finance and not English, you love to write and you've even had your work published. And when you don't have the words, you go to dictionary.com. But nothing seems to precisely capture everything you see in him. More like you're afraid that if you stare at him for too long, your nearsightedness will get even worse, but you wouldn't mind. There's always laser surgery. (But wait, I've already had LASIK done!)
Even though all it takes is the press of a button in your phone book, it's still so hard for you to call him, without making it seem like you're calling out of nowhere. And when you do, you wouldn't mind that the questioning, "Hello?" on the other end makes you want to smile but at the same time, hang up after mumbling, "Sorry, wrong number." You wouldn't mind worrying about what to get him for his birthday or Christmas present and going over the limit your first credit card had, because everyone knows how hard it is to buy presents for guys after you've done the cologne, wallet, and scarf thing. You wouldn't mind that you left something at his place and have to go get it because you need it the next morning, because it gives you the chance to see him again. You don't mind that you've probably dropped hints along the way without even realizing it, but knowing your luck, he didn't catch them. So he doesn't know. Sure, he's cute, but it's about more than that, it's his personality, his values, how he sees a lot of things the same way you do. How he introduces you to stuff for the first time and you end up truly liking (and not just because he does.) The mere thought of him makes you smile. You two just click. Anything you toss at him, he can toss right back. He makes you laugh. You knew almost right away that he's the type of guy you're looking for. You can even sense what his mind's thinking sometimes, but you can't quite yet sense what his heart is. If you just had that chance.
You remember everything he's ever told you, and when he's amazed, you just explain that you were the memory champ in 3rd grade. (Which, now that you're in the "real" world, is only the case when it comes to him, because you want him to know he's important to you, along with everything he says). You can't remember when your mom tells you to bring something up from the basement, and you can't remember that you have a client's report due in two days, yet you remember the name of the sister of the guy he met at a party and went to middle school with. Maybe it's because you actually listen when he talks. You listen for the most part, but sometimes you tend to zone out when you're bored. But when he talks, you're totally focused. But he doesn't know.
And even though he's not seeing anyone right now, you don't know if sees you as more than a friend. In fact, it's almost taboo because the two of you discuss everything and anything but relationships. Why is that? You come up with possible reasons, but it's hard to figure out which one it could be. There's really only one way to find out, but you don't because either you don't have enough guts to ask or you think that asking will ruin the friendship or make things weird. Do you really want to take that chance?
But nothing changes. He doesn't know. You get that dizzy feeling you get after doing a cartwheel that he'll never know. You get that feeling that you'll be forced to write a sappy entry in Xanga about him that all your subscribers, random xanga-ers, and probably he too, will end up reading.
You go to sleep. You wake up. He doesn't know. You're not in love. You're not obsessed. Is it more than a crush? Definitely. You blame it on the fact that it's almost impossible to meet decent, dateable guys in the city, but still, it's about more than that. It would just be nice if once in this area of your life, things worked out the way you wanted them to.
I know it's hard for guys, but it can be hard for girls too, you know. The only difference is that we won't let it kill us, just drive us nuts.
So ___________, it's about time you know.
You met him a while ago, and somehow he managed to get stuck in your head like that lyric "Shake it like a Polaroid picture." Just like you know, (after being an owner of a Polaroid camera for 10 years), that you're not supposed to shake the picture because it actually messes up the developing, you don't know why he's there. But he is, whether you like it or not. You know his cell phone number, his home phone number; even where he likes to buy groceries. But he doesn't know.
His screen name is one that cleverly incorporates part of his name, a nickname, or something that he loves to do. He adds one or two numbers at the end for his birthday, or simply because it's his lucky number. With the help of Dead Aim, you know exactly when he's no longer away because you see that little blue box shoot up from the corner of your computer screen with "_______" has just signed on. That's when you have a decision to make. To IM or not to IM? You wait a little at first, so it doesn't seem like you've been waiting for him to come back online. Then you decide not to IM him, hoping that he'll double-click your screen name first. You only seem to act this silly when it comes to the guy you like. But he doesn't know.
He's the one. All right, so maybe not the "one." Not absolutely, positively the one you're going to marry or something, but closer to Mr. Right-up-there-with-Brad-Pitt-in-Mr.-and Mrs.-Smith-or-Keanu-Reeves-in-Speed-on-your-list-of-people-you'd-give-anything-to-be-stranded-with-on-a-broken-down-elevator. (Like I was yesterday after the fire drill.) But it's about more than that. When is it ever about more than that? Never. Not like penguin suits, a 10-tier cake, embarrassing relatives who talk really loud more, but closer to a comfy blanket, two cafe mochas from Starbucks to stay awake because you two are always burning the midnight oil and need caffeine, one of those wedge-shaped pillows and a movie you have no interest in seeing more. But he doesn't know.
He's cute; a one-of-a-kind-cute that maybe only a few girls can see, but that's the best kind of cute to be. More like you're startled every time you see him, especially when you aren't expecting it and you can't help but think, Oh my gosh, do I look okay? Because he looks soo good. But then you can't help but notice that he didn't spike up his hair like he usually does, and so it has that soft, fluffy look about it. More like you can't stop writing these sentences that run on and on and make no sense at all, because it seems almost impossible to describe something ... someone ... as wonderful as he is. But you're a writer, at least on your spare time. You can describe anything if you put your mind to it. That's what you do: even though your major was accounting/finance and not English, you love to write and you've even had your work published. And when you don't have the words, you go to dictionary.com. But nothing seems to precisely capture everything you see in him. More like you're afraid that if you stare at him for too long, your nearsightedness will get even worse, but you wouldn't mind. There's always laser surgery. (But wait, I've already had LASIK done!)
Even though all it takes is the press of a button in your phone book, it's still so hard for you to call him, without making it seem like you're calling out of nowhere. And when you do, you wouldn't mind that the questioning, "Hello?" on the other end makes you want to smile but at the same time, hang up after mumbling, "Sorry, wrong number." You wouldn't mind worrying about what to get him for his birthday or Christmas present and going over the limit your first credit card had, because everyone knows how hard it is to buy presents for guys after you've done the cologne, wallet, and scarf thing. You wouldn't mind that you left something at his place and have to go get it because you need it the next morning, because it gives you the chance to see him again. You don't mind that you've probably dropped hints along the way without even realizing it, but knowing your luck, he didn't catch them. So he doesn't know. Sure, he's cute, but it's about more than that, it's his personality, his values, how he sees a lot of things the same way you do. How he introduces you to stuff for the first time and you end up truly liking (and not just because he does.) The mere thought of him makes you smile. You two just click. Anything you toss at him, he can toss right back. He makes you laugh. You knew almost right away that he's the type of guy you're looking for. You can even sense what his mind's thinking sometimes, but you can't quite yet sense what his heart is. If you just had that chance.
You remember everything he's ever told you, and when he's amazed, you just explain that you were the memory champ in 3rd grade. (Which, now that you're in the "real" world, is only the case when it comes to him, because you want him to know he's important to you, along with everything he says). You can't remember when your mom tells you to bring something up from the basement, and you can't remember that you have a client's report due in two days, yet you remember the name of the sister of the guy he met at a party and went to middle school with. Maybe it's because you actually listen when he talks. You listen for the most part, but sometimes you tend to zone out when you're bored. But when he talks, you're totally focused. But he doesn't know.
And even though he's not seeing anyone right now, you don't know if sees you as more than a friend. In fact, it's almost taboo because the two of you discuss everything and anything but relationships. Why is that? You come up with possible reasons, but it's hard to figure out which one it could be. There's really only one way to find out, but you don't because either you don't have enough guts to ask or you think that asking will ruin the friendship or make things weird. Do you really want to take that chance?
But nothing changes. He doesn't know. You get that dizzy feeling you get after doing a cartwheel that he'll never know. You get that feeling that you'll be forced to write a sappy entry in Xanga about him that all your subscribers, random xanga-ers, and probably he too, will end up reading.
You go to sleep. You wake up. He doesn't know. You're not in love. You're not obsessed. Is it more than a crush? Definitely. You blame it on the fact that it's almost impossible to meet decent, dateable guys in the city, but still, it's about more than that. It would just be nice if once in this area of your life, things worked out the way you wanted them to.
I know it's hard for guys, but it can be hard for girls too, you know. The only difference is that we won't let it kill us, just drive us nuts.
So ___________, it's about time you know.
Tuesday September 6, 2005
"We convince ourselves that life will be better after we get married,
have a baby, then another. Then we are frustrated that the kids aren't
old enough and we'll be more content when they are. After that we're
frustrated that we have teenagers to deal with. We will certainly be
happy when they are out of that stage. We tell ourselves that our life
will be complete when our spouse gets his or her act together, when we
get a nicer car, are able to go on a nice vacation, when we retire.
The truth is, there's no better time to be happy than right now. If not now, when? Your life will always be filled with challenges. It's best to admit this to yourself and decide to be happy anyway. One of my favorite quotes comes from Alfred D Souza. He said, "For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin.
At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life. This perspective has helped me to see that there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way. So, reassure every moment that you have. Treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time...and remember that time waits for no one...
So stop waiting until you finish school, until you go back to school, until you lose ten pounds, until you gain ten pounds, until you have kids, until your kids leave the house, until you start work, until you retire, until you get married, until you get divorced, until Friday night, until Sunday morning, until you get a new car or home, until your car or home is paid off, until spring, until summer, until fall, until winter, until you are off welfare, until the first or fifteenth, until your song comes on, until you've had a drink, until you've sobered up, until you die, until you are born again to decide that there is no better time than right now to be happy...
A lot of contemplation over this past weekend, trying to clear my head and figure out what I want and where I'm going.
The truth is, there's no better time to be happy than right now. If not now, when? Your life will always be filled with challenges. It's best to admit this to yourself and decide to be happy anyway. One of my favorite quotes comes from Alfred D Souza. He said, "For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin.
At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life. This perspective has helped me to see that there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way. So, reassure every moment that you have. Treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time...and remember that time waits for no one...
So stop waiting until you finish school, until you go back to school, until you lose ten pounds, until you gain ten pounds, until you have kids, until your kids leave the house, until you start work, until you retire, until you get married, until you get divorced, until Friday night, until Sunday morning, until you get a new car or home, until your car or home is paid off, until spring, until summer, until fall, until winter, until you are off welfare, until the first or fifteenth, until your song comes on, until you've had a drink, until you've sobered up, until you die, until you are born again to decide that there is no better time than right now to be happy...
Happiness is a journey, not a destination.
Thought for the day:
Work like you don't need money,
Love like you've never been hurt,
And dance like no one's watching."
Love like you've never been hurt,
And dance like no one's watching."
A lot of contemplation over this past weekend, trying to clear my head and figure out what I want and where I'm going.
reflect. cherish. aspire.
Wednesday August 17, 2005
I refuse to forget the countless number of fond memories I have. Nor do I wish to disregard the bad ones completely, because they are essential in my ability to learn from my mistakes and prior experiences. A person's past and accumulation of memories play a significant role in who they are today. Although things might have seemed easier back then, getting older (and wiser) is not as bad as it seems.
Each and every day I count my blessings for how lucky I feel to have the life I do. Hearing all the crazy stuff on the news and even from the people around me, I can't help but appreciate the fact that I have a loving family and great friends, a job that I hopefully will enjoy, and split my time between city and suburbia. Another thing is my health, because without it, there's no way I could possibly enjoy everything else. I'd say that for the most part, I'm content with my life.
I look forward to what the future has in store, but there will always be those uncertainties. I take a day at a time, but who doesn't wonder what could possibly happen later on that day or even a year from now? The thing is, I know what I want to happen, but whether or not it will is a different story. Right now I'm in this transitional period, preparing for the life of a young professional and the so called "real world" of paying for bills and making it on my own. I'm up for the challenge, but I know it won't be a piece of cake. As the days dwindle down to 9/19, the more apprehensive I get about starting work. Will I not dread waking up for and going to the office every morning? Or in the audtior's case, to my clients' office?
Yesterday I saw "March of the Penguins," that documentary on the life of the Empire Penguin down in Antarctica. Those penguins have a pretty difficult life, considering they travel over 70 miles in the harshest conditions to find their "mate," and then risk their lives so that their offspring can survive. But when they finally arrive at their destination, within days they've found their "one" with some waddling, a simple call, and touch of beaks. If only it were that easy. But then again, people come and go in and out of our lives for a reason, and I am a better person because of those I've crossed paths with.
Saturday, April 22, 2006
I hate the feeling of suppressing a thought that should've come out of
my mouth, with apprehension that not having done so will most likely
reflect badly upon me in some angle. I sometimes feel like I have to
put on that happy face or cheer in my voice when at that particular
moment I'm anything but. I vaguely recall an essay I had to write in
college about "wearing masks" and "playing parts," something that
people in the business world often have to do in order to adapt to their
surroundings and situations, whether it be with coworkers or clients.
It definitely extends beyond the workplace though to our daily lives,
whether we realize it or not.
Maybe it's not a mask per se - an identity that is not at all yours, but a facet of your personality that does exist, with you bringing it out when you see fit, even though underneath that mask, your mind and heart express something completely different. Why is this? I guess instinctively to put up a defense for ourselves, but at the same time, to protect those who we might hurt if we chose to disagree instead of agree, or bluntly tell the truth instead of that little white lie. Is it a sense of selflessness? Who knows. We could just be watching our own backs. In the end all parties will be affected somehow. Maybe it's unreasonable, but that's just the way it is. It's a horrible feeling.
Maybe it's not a mask per se - an identity that is not at all yours, but a facet of your personality that does exist, with you bringing it out when you see fit, even though underneath that mask, your mind and heart express something completely different. Why is this? I guess instinctively to put up a defense for ourselves, but at the same time, to protect those who we might hurt if we chose to disagree instead of agree, or bluntly tell the truth instead of that little white lie. Is it a sense of selflessness? Who knows. We could just be watching our own backs. In the end all parties will be affected somehow. Maybe it's unreasonable, but that's just the way it is. It's a horrible feeling.
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
Be dissatisfied, be grateful
Thursday June 19, 2003
Life is precious and fragile. Live your life to the fullest by following two rules:
1) Be dissatisfied
2) Be grateful
Be dissatisfied. Don't let life carry you along like a leaf in a current of waters. Find what is important to you and pursue it. Discover your passions, whether it be family, a hobby, or a dream. Create goals. Strive to make a difference in this world, however small. Always work towards self improvement. Be critical and examine the world around you. Take advantage of your potential. Use your time wisely to take baby steps towards fulfillment of your dreams and this will make you feel good.
Be grateful. Appreciate the world and the people around you. Respect others. Take time to recognize that you would not be who you are without these people in your life. Make an effort to understand their dreams, their passions, and what drives them. Be a motivating force in helping them to achieve their dreams and this will make you feel great.
speaker at UC Berkeley graduation
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